Elite Deportment

When in company, put not your hands to any part of the body not usually discovered
-George Washington

More than appearances, a lady or a gentleman can be identified by his or her noble mien because a monkey in a suit is still a monkey; clothes only cover the shame of nudity but not the shame of ignorance.

In the above quote, ‘part of the body not usually discovered’ refers to body parts that have little or no relevance in civilized company. Even though they are the most socially expressive body part, the hands should be limited to discovered body parts when in company (especially one that includes the opposite sex). As implied in the quote, the hands are the ‘pointers of attention’ in social gatherings and are usually used to clap, share, write, demonstrate and hug. They are however unusually used when they are placed:

Between the legs (males): Aside from revealing that you opted for boxers over briefs, this gesture is socially awkward.

On your derriere (especially females): The reason it’s called a ‘private part’ is because one’s relationship with it should be incognito.

On your chest (especially females): Another faux pas to commit when others’ attention is pinned on you. It is a distracting gesture.

However, exigencies do occur in social gatherings as in having the strong urge to adjust an underwear or itch an undiscovered body part. The bathroom or a secluded corner comes in handy in this situation as they allow for privacy to relieve oneself.

God help you if an insect flies into your clothes when you have the stage of a very important audience… He helped me too!