“He who is honoured has first honoured himself”
Expression is simply the manifestation of a feeling (desire) or innateness.
Even though they only last for, relatively, short periods of time, the consistency of their nature presents a valid yardstick for establishing the judgment of our civility.
Because the natures of expressions range from spontaneous to premeditated, they could either be genteel or outright boorish.
We are culprits of vulgarity due to ignorance and sometimes, the intensity of a desire or feeling. Below are twelve manifestations of incivility we tend to trivialize.
1. Slamming The Door: This rude way of announcing one’s arrival or departure and could be risky for the person coming behind. It is appropriate to look behind and shut the door gently if no one’s approaching and to open the door till the next person reaches it if people are.
2. Shouting: It is impolite to shout when one is required to talk. If you have a loud speaking voice, practice speaking gently but audibly. There’s no taste in being reputed as a shouter.
3. Spontaneous & Uncontrollable Laughter:(I am ‘consciously uncoupling’ myself from this one) A comedian may be hilarious with his jokes but not so much that you abandon poise for buffoonery because you will get over the joke faster than others will get over your travesty.
4. Demanding: Being the boss is no reason to make ‘please-less’ requests. ‘Pleases’ and ‘Thank yous’ are not exclusive to subordinates, they are the language of the socially sound.
5. Messing up the Bathroom: It really does not matter if one found it dirty or clean, one should leave the restroom cleaner than one met it. A dirty bathroom reveals one’s disregard for hygiene and inconsideration for the next user- with hard evidence sometimes. A bathroom that is too dirty to be properly cleaned after usage should not be used at all.
6. Moistening Fingers with Spit: This is usually practiced when money is being counted or when flipping the newspaper but it is oh-so-gross because not only is the money or paper now spitted on, germs from the money/ paper are directly transferred into the mouth. If there is no Sortwik in sight, a piece of foam or cotton wool can be soaked with water to moisten the fingers and allow for an easier and cleaner flip.
(Hint: If someone moistens their fingers with spit when reading the papers which you will like to read later, pick it up at the top left side and flip from the top right. People generally flip from the right bottom corner and rarely from the top. It is a cleaner read that way….you’re welcome!)
7. Nose Picking: This is never a pretty sight, especially when it strikes you that the same hand could be extended for a handshake. The nose should be cleaned with a handkerchief or cotton wool or toilet paper in private. If your nose itches, place a finger on top and discreetly massage.
8. Snorting: This is another habit that is not too tasteful in company. Unlike snoring, snorting is a voluntary action and should not be done in public.
9. Scrambling: There is no virtue in scrambling for a seat, for food or for whatever. The chaos that is created is indecorous. Whether it’s at a party, conference or bus stop turns should always be assigned in an orderly fashion.
10. Spitting: There is no justification for spitting in public; everyone has to step on that ground. If there is a reason to expel spit, it should be done in private and not to everyone’s full glare.
11. Urinating in Public: It is high time the government implemented a restraining order for this act. Urinating in public means that one cares more about his or her relief (usually his) than messing up the sidewalk and forcing passersby to get a glimpse of the act. It is not okay for one to force his/ her privacy in public; you have to excuse yourself for that.
12. Farting In Company: Two inconveniences are created by doing this. Others have to guess who did it (and hope to God that they are not suspects to others) and choke on the repulsive gas whilst doing that. Your privacy does not come to you, you go to it.
We are sometimes so expressive that we offend. Every diamond was once a piece of rock but a refining and polishing process is introduced somewhere along the line. There is a measurement of expression that is a prerequisite to exhibiting good sense of expression. We can have an even better sense of expression no matter how refined it is now.