There are many things that make an impression on a first date- from flowers to wine to a sense of humour.
However, if you’re going to make a lasting impression, and, possibly secure a second date and a third and so on, you should take cognisance of certain things.
I hasten to add that I’m not a dating expert- this discussion is more like emphasising the role of basic etiquettes on a formal date.
One benefit of a good impression here is that even if a second date is not eventually secured, a good word is.
First and most important is your speech since you will be talking most of the time.
In all thy asking, ask not the wrong questions!
Ridiculous inquiries range from a person’s weight to their age, income and underwear colour.
You think it’s strange too?
Lay off your curiosity- it’s not possible to know ALL about someone in two hours, if you succeed in doing that, be rest assured that all you know is questionable.
In time, it becomes easier to divulge personal info so focus on building a steady relationship.
Another point is compliment tactfully.
Many things we count as a compliment is not received as such.
A horrendous mistake some guys make is equating the description of a lady’s physical features to paying her a compliment.
Guys, consider this a free ‘toasting tip’- not every girl likes that, especially when she’s not your woman.
It’s enough that you gawk at her (until she’s embarrassed). But to go further and verbalise what you think about her bosom (or any aspect of her features that fascinates you) speaks nothing more than cluelessness.
A compliment may be ‘You look beautiful’ or ‘pretty’, ‘ravishing’, ‘dazzling’, ‘gorgeous’, ‘stunning’, ‘breath-taking’, ‘amazing’, ‘mind-blowing’ or any of the forty-something words being displayed on my thesaurus.
This will win you a genuine blush. Try it!
As I write this, I recall laughingly, a story I once read about a first date couple.
The lady was beautiful and the man, equally good-looking.
As the night grew, so did his attraction to her and vice versa.
Then something happened.
The man, hoping to compliment the lady said something like this, ‘Your body is so nice, you have all the right curves in all the right places, your chest….’ And he went on and on until he totally stripped her with his words.
Mortified, the lady reached for her purse and headed for the door but remembered what she forgot halfway.
She came back to the table and gave him a slap before exiting the building.
The poor ‘gentleman’ was confused! He obviously thought he was paying her a compliment but the lady felt insulted.
Not that I encourage a lady to get physical, just highlighting a point.
Finally for this issue, please don’t touch unnecessarily- this is again especially for the guys.
The rule is the less familiar you are with a lady, the less you should touch her.
Nobody touches the Queen of England except she initiates it, as in a handshake.
Treat the lady likewise. Friends are the exception of course.
The ladies aren’t exempted from this one either.
If you are a ‘toucher’ you will do well to hold your hands!
Else, you will be communicating a message you did not originally intend to pass across.
All said, don’t be so uptight that you forget to enjoy the date.
Not everyone will disqualify you because you made a mistake on the first date.
Your gaffe may be graciously overlooked because a quality of greater import holds the attention.
So the next time you’re on a date, be sure to make it great.
2 thoughts on “First Date Code”
Nice tips, these mistakes are common